Wednesday, April 4, 2012

I'll Never Beat My Wife

I know most of you read my wife's blog ... Slowly Tri-Ing ... so I know you're probably aware of our little weight loss "contest" going on right now.  It's probably the dumbest thing EVER!!!  I'm pretty thin - some would say too thin.  But a few weeks ago I was about 10 lbs heavier than where I typically run my fastest - and I have one of my "A" Races coming up a week from Saturday.  So I decided that I needed to drop a few pounds to help me hopefully PR in the half-marathon.

My wife also thin.  But she got it in her mind that she needed to lose weight too.  And to motivate herself, she decided to make it some crazy competition with me.  Supposedly the winner gets a super-duper big prize of some sort.  Well my friends ... this little contest has several flaws:

1) Would any man in his right mind ever beat his wife in a weight loss competition???  How dumb do you have to be to NOT let her win???


2) Even if I was trying - which I AM NOT - the results are swayed in her favor.  The contest isn't based on total pounds lost ... it percentage of weight loss against our overall starting weight!!!  I friggin' outweigh her by about 50 lbs!!!  So I've got to lose something like 78 lbs to every 1 lb she loses just to stay even!!!


3) The fact that my wife is trying to lose weight is ridiculous.  She's flat-out sexy man!  Wonderful in every way! Completely unnecessary!  I mean, why not just start up a contest to make her even sweeter ... or even more beautiful?  There's no point in it man, she's perfect!!!  


4) It doesn't matter if Michael wins the weight loss contest - she's just gonna go out and buy what she wants anyway!

So this is why I'm officially not trying in this contest.   She thinks I am ... but I'm not.  I'll just get down to my race weight and let her win this little charade. By the way Michael, I've lost 7.6 lbs so far ... but keep up the good work babe - it's cute!
... be great today!

20 comments:

  1. Aaagh, the numbers game. I concentrate on eating nutrient dense foods that supply the proper amount of carbs and B vitamins for energy, protein for muscle repair and synthesis and fat for nerves and fighting inflammation (omega's). Also, already thin females who diet need to beware of the female athlete triad syndrome. Stay healthy!

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  2. Oh my god that's funny! Not sure if your trying to get on her good side or bad. :)

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  3. I said it before my friend - How could you win? Thin ice... haha

    You both are too funny. Thanks

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  4. Good stuff - I'm going through this exact same thing as I tag along while my wife does Weight Watchers Online. We haven't made any declarations about a contest, but my wife is quietly making it one. For whatever reason it's easier for me to lose pounds (assuming I stick to the plan) which drives her nuts. As long as we're both losing weight in a healthy way everyone wins I suppose.

    Also - 7.6 lbs - not too shabby. Certainly can't hurt in the PR hunt.

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  5. Did Michael write this post? I am suspicious! :)

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  6. HAAA!!! I hope your couch is comfy

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  7. the best post of the morning!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  8. You're right. Michael is amazing! I don't think she needs to lose weight. What would be cool though if you went out on your lunch hour and bought her a new Cervello. Google that.

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  9. Well, I hate to tell you that I think right now you are winning. Stress has stalled out my weight loss this week.....it sucks!

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  10. ba ha ha ha! excuses, excuses. I can see that you are not competetive at all. :)

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  11. Hmmm...I think it sounds like you're afraid of the competition.....Lots of weasel words in that post, Jim! If you can't take the heat, stay out of the kitchen......:^)

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  12. Win, and you'll be sleeping in the doghouse. Hopefully it's big enough for ya! :)

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  13. ah flattery....that is always the way to go...Bill takes that road also. He's always said I did not need to loose weight. well that may be true for Michael but for me it was not. now he says I am too thin. flattery is good. :) now saying you would "let" her win...I am not sure that's a winner!!!

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  14. All I'm hearing is excuses. It's not a fair fight. I threw the first round. I'll distract her by flattering her. She won and girls rule!

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  15. All I'm hearing is excuses. It's not a fair fight. I threw the first round. I'll distract her by flattering her. She won and girls rule!

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  16. I agree with Char - you're not trying hard enough ;)

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  17. This is the best husband post ever. You rock!

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