Wednesday, December 28, 2011

And Now: Another Conversation w/Michael & Jim

The other day, everyone's friend Jason, of Cook Train Eat Race left this comment for my wife Michael, of Slowly Tri-ing after a post about running the Disney Marathon ...

"Are you taking any tips from Jim?
He's run a few marathons I probably have heard about them...."
When I read that ... I fell out of my chair laughing!!!  ... tips from Jim??? ...... tips from Jim??? ... tips fr---
ahahahahahahahahah ... playa please!!!

There's a story that Jesus tells in the Bible that goes, "Only in his hometown, among family and friends, is a Prophet without honor". (paraphrased of course)  That is basically the story around our house on a daily basis when it comes to me, Michael, and running.  Now I'm obviously not an expert (Prophet), but I've been at this running stuff for a while, and at times have had some very minor success in the sport.  Plus, I friggin' study running & fitness religiously and try to get better at training and racing.  But if you think my hard headed woman wonderful love of my life is gonna listen to a thing I say ... you must be sipping the 3 day old egg nog my friend!  Here's how that conversation usually goes ...

Jim ... "Hi sweetie, wow you look even more beautiful than yesterday ... if that's even possible!"

Michael ... "Do you need something, I'm really busy reading about Triathlons ... THE superior sport!"

Jim ... "Oh, then I won't disturb you, I just thought I'd share a few things I've learned about long runs."

Michael ... "PAAALEEEEEEZZZZEEEE ... what do you know about running???"

Jim ... "Well, I've learned that it's really easy to run a little faster than you want at the beginning of a run, and usually if you don't adjust your pace, you might hit th---"

Michael ... "HIT THE WALL??? Is that what you were going to say??? Listen pal - I DON'T HIT THE WALL!!!  Didn't you read my last blog post ... I just "Kicked that 20 mile's A$$"!!!!!!"

Jim ... "I know - you are doing sooooo great with your training - I just thought if you needed any pointers, I would be honored to help you in any---."

Michael ... "HAHAHAHA ... that's cute!  I've seen the BQ's you've promised and didn't deliver, and all the times you had to stop and walk in marathons, and that STUPID PR BEARD??? No thanks, if I need advice from you - and I NEVER WILL - I'll ask for it!"

Jim ... "Whoa ... whoa ......................... whoa!  You can insult me all you want.  But please leave The PR Beard out of this."

Michael ... "Get lost loser - go find another 3 person race so you can win your age group again!  You're not as fast as you think you are!!!"

Jim ... "I'm sexy and you know it!"

Question of the day:
A. Should Michael listen to Jim when it comes to running?
B. Should Michael listen to Jim when it comes to EVERYTHING?

I wish Michael the best of luck with Disney!!!  But honestly, she doesn't need luck, or my help for that matter - she is gonna be awesome in Orlando!!!  And I'll be there to watch her cross the finish line victoriously ... I love you sweetie! You are soooo awesome!!! (But seriously, that's EXACTLY what she says)
... be great today!


  1. the answer is
    C. Jim should listen to Michael when it comes to everything!
    Funny story, I've been running for a couple of years, my farthest is a half marathon, no marathons for me thank you, but last spring I convinced my husband (who never runs, except for more beer) to run 3 miles WITH me, he stuck with me for a bit and then ran ahead, and finished first, he was drinking gatorade on the deck when I got back. Anyway, he was in pain for 3 days from his run.....but he'll say he was faster than his wife :)

  2. I'm surprised that you didn't get the "ya know, you could have offered this 'advice' when I needed it, not now when my training is almost done" gambit.

    I can't wait for the post Disney conversation.

  3. I think Jim could get a PR sleeping on the sofa tonight.

  4. OMG. Too funny. Not exactly how I picture Michael talking to you, but funny nonetheless. :o)

  5. hilarious!

    Karen is going to do her first triathlon and I've already put in my own gag order. No talking about it at all b/c otherwise it would look just like that.

  6. I love your wife! She's got my kind of spunk and I can relate:)

    I'm not doubting your abilities or greatness though. I'm sure you know your stuff. Heck, who wouldn't with as much racing as you do.

  7. Love Coy's comment. Now I'm going to Michael's blog to get the real version of this.

  8. Oh sweetie, when are you going to learn??

  9. ha ha Michael is going to do awesome in Orlando!! Very cool that you will get to cross that finish line together.

    I have a feeling that being out there for 5 hours will give you a whole new respect for your wife.

  10. I am going to go with Christa's option of C. How is that couch working out for you? Disney is going to be so awesome - I am pretty sure Michael has got this one - with or without the PR beard!

  11. Oh to be a fly on the wall around your house... :) At least I'm sure you got the last part right and she is going to do great in Florida!

  12. I listen to anyone who can run faster than me. But understand the dilema of advice from a spouse. I love the "converstations". I am sure that Michael will be posting her version of the converstation on her blog soon.

  13. I dare you to have one of THESE conversations when Michael's preparing dinner and has a sharp knife in her hand. By THESE I mean condescending and patronising. You're lucky to come out of it with all your bits intact.

    And please ask Michael to put on her true and correct version of the conversation.

  14. ah Jim...I think you are my husband Bill's distant cousin or something...

    now I am sure this did NOT go down like that at all...unless this was a dream and you are confusing that with reality...they must have a pill for that...

    so were you directed to the guest bedroom after this one.....

    I would hide any razors or sharp anything if I were you..the beard is in serious danger I think

  15. you guys are just freaking awesome.

    I say listen to each other. [i know, BORING!]


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